Some
fun-filled food for counterfactual thought...
what if the image-hungry, sensationalist,
24-7 television news networks of today had
been there to cover the Allied invasion of
Europe in 1944?
TRANSCRIPT
Wednesday,
June 21, 1944, 7 p.m. EDT -- In the background
we hear the sound of clicking typewriters
gradually drowned out by the rising crescendo
of an Aaron Copland fanfare. A series of short
News Reel-esque clips bombard the screen (e.g.,
a bomber taking off from an island airstrip,
a Navy destroyer cruising the Pacific, American
Sherman tanks engaged in a firefight, scores
of Airborne paratroopers floating through
the evening sky). As the last action
clip fades it is replaced by the full-screen
WBC network logo, and the sound of the narrator’s
voice over the music:
“War coverage when you want
it, this is Day 16 of award-winning WBC’s
Operation French Toast...” While the logo fades
and we see a wide shot of the ornate newsroom
studio gradually zooming in on the anchor,
the narrator concludes:
“Now, from our New York studio, here’s
Chet McClusky.”
A cosmetically enhanced middle-aged
man in a gray suit coat sits behind a charcoal-colored
formica counter, looking important with his
thin spectacles dangling on the edge of his
nose and a stack of typed pages firmly held
in his well-manicured hands.
CHET: Welcome to our continuing
Day 16 coverage of Operation French Toast.
I’m Chet McClusky live from
the WBC Supercenter in downtown Manhattan. [Over the anchor’s
shoulder in the upper right hand of the screen
is an inset photograph of General Eisenhower
underneath the phrase “Bogged Down?”]
Our top story tonight: are United States
and British forces bogged down in the hedgerows
of western France?
Has the Allied invasion been a complete
blunder?
To help answer these questions and
more, we have in our studios WBC’s military
analyst and special consultant, retired Navy
Commander Hank Whittaker.
Commander Whittaker, welcome back to
the program.
[As
the inset graphic fades, the camera angle
widens again to show a considerably shorter
and angrier looking man in a powder blue suit
seated to Chet’s left, from the audience’s
view. His
hands are folded tightly on the counter in
front of him as he nervously makes his best
effort not to look like he’s staring into
the camera.]
WHITTAKER: Uh, thank you, thank
you, Chet. My pleasure.
CHET: Commander Whittaker,
what do you make of the reports coming in
from the front that Allied troops are bogged
down?
WHITTAKER: Well, they haven’t
made it very far since hitting the beaches
two weeks ago.
The sacrifices of our troops seem to
have been just too great for what has been
accomplished thus far.
CHET: But they did
take the beaches, didn’t they?
WHITTAKER: Sure, sure.
But from the high expectations that
were built up within the Roosevelt administration’s
PR department, you’d think they should be
a lot closer to Paris by now.
Now, naturally, I could have orchestrated
a better overall campaign myself.
CHET: Really?
WHITTAKER: [slightly incensed
at the anchor’s skepticism]
Really, Chet. Why, if they had
listened to me, we could have saved all those
battleships at Pearl.
And don’t even get me started about
the Philippines...
CHET: [trying to bring
the discussion back to the subject at hand]
Commander Whittaker.
Are things, things over there in France,
are they really as bad as you suggest?
WHITTAKER: [in contrast to
his previous remarks, his words suddenly assume
the air of being obviously rehearsed]
With every passing day it’s becoming more
and more apparent to me that there has been
some serious deviation from the original battle
plan.
CHET: How’s that, Commander? [Whittaker reaches
below the counter and procures a thick, hard-covered,
olive drab manual and sets it in front of
him.] Could you show
that to our audience?
[Whittaker stands the book on end,
unaware that it is upside down.]
Er, other way, I think.
WHITTAKER: Oh.
[He straightens the book so the
televised audience can read the title clearly
printed on the cover, “Operation Overlord: The Allied High Command’s Master Plan
for Cracking Hitler’s Fortress Europe.”
After a few seconds, he sets the book
back down and begins thumbing through the
pages. The anchor decides
to cover the awkward silence.]
CHET: For our audience
at home, Commander Whittaker is consulting
the official war plan right now. While he does that,
we’re going to... [He pauses at the unexpected
sound coming into his earpiece.] I take that back. We have a breaking news report coming
from one of our embedded reporters.
That’s an official Operation French
Toast Breaking News Bulletin.
[appropriate logo appears on the
screen over Chet’s right shoulder] This is from... Max
Blonoza, who has been traveling with elements
of the 101st Airborne in western France. I think the digital
feed is down, but we do have live audio.
[He raises his voice as if obviously
talking to someone new in the conversation] Max, are you there? [After a notable
pause, we finally hear the correspondent’s
voice. On
a split screen we see a still photo of the
dark and dashing Max Blonoza, featuring the
phrase “By Phone: Max Blonoza,” all superimposed
on a graphically generated map of western
France with a star indicating his exact position]
MAX: Good evening, Chet.
CHET: Good eve....
MAX: At the moment pretty
much all is quiet here near the cozy village
of Carentan, where I’m with the 518th Parachute
Infantry Regiment of the 101st Airborne Division.
The troops are loosely deployed in
defensive positions along the ridges southeast
of town....
CHET: Excuse me, Max, excuse
me for just a moment if you will.
Are you supposed to be sharing such
detailed information with the highest-rated
television audience in North America?
MAX: [obviously agitated] Uh... as I was saying
pretty much all is quiet now, a big contrast
with earlier today, when, uh, other elements
of the 101st Airborne engaged members of the
German Wehrmacht a few miles east of here.
If we wait just a minute, we should
be able to see that....
[The
video footage is poorly lit, poorly focused,
and unsteady.
One can barely hear the sounds of rapid
gunfire, shouting, and background explosions.
It goes on like this for nearly thirty
seconds before the anchor interrupts.]
CHET: [aghast] Is this the breaking news?
WHITTAKER: I’ve found it here. It’s on page 652,
right hand column, second paragraph down....
CHET: I wasn’t talking
to you.
MAX: [oblivious to
the exchange in the studio] I’m sorry about the
quality of the video.
What we were trying to show you....
[Before he can finish, the signal breaks
down and his voice becomes inaudible]
CHET: It seems we’re experiencing,
er, technical difficulties.
[another pause to listen to the
earpiece]
Reports are coming fresh off the wire
that our rival network DNN is airing preliminary
reports that WBC embedded reporter Max Blonoza
has just been stripped of his journalistic
credentials by Army officials and is being
sent back to Great Britain.
This is breaking news that supersedes
the earlier breaking news.
[casually aside]
Perhaps we should call it an Operation
French Toast Breaking Breaking News Bulletin? [clearing his
throat] I must emphasize,
however, that this is an unclear preliminary
report, but as you could tell, we did lose
touch with Max.
WHITTAKER: As I was saying,
page 652... [Viewers can still the retired
Navy Commander’s lips moving but with his
microphone cut off, the rest of what he says
is indiscernible.
Finally, the camera zooms back on Chet,
leaving Whittaker out of the picture.
Off camera, stage hands forcibly remove
him from the set.]
CHET: Back to Max Blonoza’s
breaking news, which was coming to us live...
and fresh... right before it was interrupted
by other breaking news -- Operation French
Toast special breaking breaking news
-- and we did want to pass that along to you.
It’s our commitment to the highest
quality of news service here at WBC.
Anyway, as I was saying, Max was going
to tell us that there is a lot of sandbagging
going along in his sector of the front.
It appears to WBC’s cameras that American
soldiers are digging in.
I repeat, it appears to award-winning
WBC’s cameras and reporters, bringing you
the highest quality of news coverage available,
that the Allied offensive in France has bogged
down. [turning
to face the new camera angle]
But the question still looms on what
this military quagmire means for the domestic
political scene.
Let’s go now to our White House correspondent,
Dale Stunkler.
Dale?
[The
audience now sees an aging, balding man with
tie loosened standing on the lawn just outside
the Presidential Mansion.
He’s holding microphone in one hand
and a half-empty bottle of bourbon in the
other.]
DALE: Good evening, Chet. The White House was
shamefully unresponsive today to troubling
developments in western France. As usual, President Roosevelt desperately
tried to gloss over... [his eyes becoming
glassy and distant] the hard, bitterly
disillusioning facts about this war.
[catching himself]
The President, seated awkwardly in
his wheelchair, had this to say earlier this
afternoon.
[A
video rolls showing a haggard FDR delivering
a statement at an afternoon press conference. “Gentlemen of the
press, I think your concerns are too far overstated.
The brave men of our Armed Forces are
deployed all over the world right now in a
very important struggle against the wicked
forces of Fascism and militarism.
Their heroism and valor deserve to
be lauded, and our prayers continue to go
out on their behalf, as well for their families.
I have the greatest faith in General
Eisenhower, his team of strategists, and the
entire Allied chain of command.
Our victory is certain.
It is only a matter of time now.
Let us simply pray for the safest and
speediest conclusion to this conflict and
show our patriotic support in any way we can.”]
The President’s evasive answers have
made many Washington insiders increasingly
unsettled [hiccups] - excuse me - and
talk is today that a closer investigation
of the master war plan needs to be made.
What is known, of course, is that our
troops are bogged down in France and that
the administration remains tight-lipped on
the matter. The result on the morale of the American
people remains to be seen.
This is Dale Stunkler reporting from
the White House for award-winning WBC News.
CHET: Thanks, Dale. Earlier today, our star reporter Geraldine
Farrell sat down with one of Hollywood’s biggest
stars, Darlene Wilburn. Naturally, as you all know, Miss Wilburn
has been one of the leading anti-war voices.
She recently led a large demonstration
on her palatial Malibu estate. This is some of what
the elegant Darlene Wilburn had to say to
our own Geraldine Farrell.
[The
tape rolls of the interview, showing the two
women sitting in Wilburn’s plush Malibu parlor. With a single camera
angle, we can only see the back of the reporter’s
head in a large chair.
Most of the view is taken up by the
self-absorbed and eccentric Hollywood star,
who speaks in between puffs from her cigarette,
naturally clamped at the end of a long holder.]
GERALDINE: How do you defend
yourself against charges that your anti-war
stance makes you a National Socialist and
Japanese imperialist sympathizer?
DARLENE: That’s absurd. A shame, a shame.
Just a shame.
How can anyone say anything like that?
I am just exercising my First Amendment
right to speak and be heard.
And besides... I’m famous!
People may money to see me on the big
screen. I epitomize glamour and beauty!
Well then, can I just say, Genevieve,
can I just say that I don’t want to see anyone
get hurt?
Every time an American plane drops
a bomb, oh my, the poor, innocent life that
is wiped out!
I’m not pro-Nazzy, or pro-Jap, not
at all. I
don’t want to see anyone get hurt.
If those other guys hurt people, shame
on them.
But I don’t want our boys hurting anyone. Until we can figure out a way to have
war without killing and hurting innocent people,
we should just forget it altogether.
[A
moment of stunned silence]
GERALDINE: We here at WBC are
overwhelmed by your humanitarian concern,
a concern that has grown exponentially as
your box office draw has gone down.
[speeding up so as to cut off an
incensed but slow-witted response] Do you think your
controversial stance affects your popularity,
especially among our troops?
DARLENE: Jessica dear, our
troops are not the bad guys.
How many times do I have to say that?
I support the troops, and naturally,
they support me.
Can’t somebody support the troops and
just not like war?
GERALDINE: Uh-huh.
But a lot of people don’t like war.
What you ask for goes a little bit
further, don’t you think?
DARLENE:
I guess I’m the only one with courage
to stand up and put into action what I believe,
but what’s wrong with calling for our government
to stop ordering our young men to kill, kill,
kill? If you don’t like
war, then you should do something to stop
it. And
as far as I can tell, that’s the only surefire
thing that’ll make it work. And I know the American
people in their heart of hearts are behind
me. You
should have seen the turnout at my anti-war
rally here....
GERALDINE:
How many were there?
DARLENE: [laughing nervously] Excellent question,
Janie, excellent question....
[At
this point, the video abruptly stops, and
we’re returned to Chet McClusky in the studio]
CHET: A compelling interview...
quite compelling.
For our viewers who would like to see
it in its entirety, please stay tuned to award-winning
WBC News coverage, and we’ll air it at 9 p.m.
Eastern time. That’s Darlene Wilburn talking to our
own Geraldine Farrell, tonight at 9 as we
continue Day 16 coverage of Operation French
Toast. Don’t miss it. [The “Breaking News” music theme plays,
the repetitive drumbeat making the point clearly.
Chet assumes a very sober posture and
tone, clinging as for life to the typed page
in his hands.]
It almost seems astonishing, but we
have another Operation French Toast
Breaking News Bulleting at this late hour.
The German Information Ministry is
reporting, it is now after 1 a.m. in France,
that Allied bombing raids over western Germany
have taken the lives of more than 100 German
citizens tonight.
Echoing these sentiments, the chairman
of the League of Nations has also issued a
formal statement, calling this a “humanitarian
crisis of the first order.” To repeat, WBC has
just learned from official German sources
that American and British bombs have killed
at least 100 innocent German citizens tonight.
[pauses] I believe we do have
a tape from Berlin Radio.
This played on the air less than an
hour ago, we believe.
[The sound of static is quickly
replaced by a loud German man’s voice overlaid
by a less dramatic English translation:
“The Reich will withstand this most
hideous attack.
We will not be dismayed by bombs dropped
on our mothers and our sisters, our wives
and our little ones, our aging neighbors. The invaders will crumble in their attempt
to destroy the Fatherland....”]
For those of you just tuning in, let’s
sum up. Allied
troops are bogged down in western France as
the offensive grinds to a near halt.
Allied commanders discard the failed
war plan as they scramble to look for an answer
to the unexpectedly strong resolve of the
German forces.
The White House is avoiding serious
inquiries into the military quagmire, while
morale on the homefront sags and anti-war
sentiment is on the rise.
Meanwhile, reports come in saying that
Allied forces continue to slaughter European
innocents....
WHITTAKER: [breaking his
way back onto the set] That’s a lie! Whose side are you on, McClusky?
CHET: We’ll be back to
more of Day 16 of Operation French Toast after
this commercial message from Champion Cigarettes,
with the soothing flavor you love.... [struggling
to break free from an attacking Whittaker]
...with the soothing flavor you love
that’s strong enough for today’s American
man... [still struggling]
Get him off me! [stage hands rush
on to break up the melee just before the cameras
cut to commercial] ...But Ph balanced for women, too!
Ben DeGrow, founder
and CEO of Jammin Amalgamated Inc, lives in
Colorado with his wife Marya. He is the author
of the underground cult classic
Chloe and Conscience
Gray, and founder of the popular
"Free Koon" movement. Ben
earned an M.A. in history from The Pennsylvania
State University in 2001 and is earnestly
looking for some kind of full-time employment
that will utilize his finely honed writing
skills. For more of a glimpse inside Ben's
busy mind, visit http://groups.msn.com/JamminAmalgamatedInc
©
Copyright Ben DeGrow 2003
